How To Tell Your Child(ren) About Your Divorce

The worst thing to do is to do nothing. It is a time of great emotions for you which may include hurt, pain, humiliation, confusion, and a host of other emotions. Yet it is a time when you must deal with the emotions of your child(ren).

The response of your children may range from being pleased (in the case of abuse and/or long term disharmony) to shock and anger. Listed below are some guidelines for telling your children.

WHO

Both of you is ideal. You should sit down as a family so all hear the same things and can ask questions.

WHEN

The best time is a few days to a week before your physical separation.

HOW

Meet as a family.
Be available and encourage questions.
Be considerate and honest in answering questions.
Do not get into blame.
Do not discuss details of the other's faults.

BE TRUTHFUL

Do not use honesty as a weapon to hurt your spouse, but be truthful.
Be respectful of your child(ren's) love for both of you.
Consider the need for stability in the lives of your children.
The more information, the better. Don't be so brief that your child(ren) try to fill in the blanks.
Discuss what changes will occur, e.g., who will be moving, what you expect might happen.
Explain that it is not their fault.

WHAT NOT TO DO

Do not wait until one of the parents have already left.
Do not lie.
Do not tell them before a definite decision is made to split up.

Palo Verde Child & Family Services, Inc.
2801 S. Valley View Blvd., Suite 10
Las Vegas, NV 89102
(702) 243-4357